The past year has brought me many struggles on a number of fronts but a couple of months ago I saw a light and started to change directions. Trying to find a balance between all or nothing in all areas of my life. I have gotten back to a really good work schedule - minimal over time compared to too much over time. I have come back to cooking and not every night but a lot of nights - cooking from scratch a lot of the time too. I have started seeing a nutritionist and she is wonderful. I have started back to my home gym not on a routine basis.
Here are the things I have learned and somethings I still need to work on
- As much as I LOVE to cook I have to learn that it is alright to make Mac and Cheese no one will judge me for making a box of KD - only I will. It sounds silly but since I started this journey one of the most difficult challenges has been accepting that it is ok to not be a rock star chef every night of the week - some nights it is about basic survival and making sure there is supper on the table. I still struggle with this one.
- Balance at work. I think I've got this one coming closer. This long weekend I had to take some time and go into the office to catch up on work. That being said I committed at the outset that at least one day I would do no work and I would sleep in. Well that's today. I slept to noon, got up watch some Top Chef Canada, made giant apple pancakes for "breakfast" (4:00 pm) and I'm about to make two cakes. But I am taking some time off in the summer to compensate. The monkey is most important - spending the time I have with her and teaching her is the most important thing.
- Nothing I accomplish in my life will matter if I mess up raising my children
- Balance working out. 5 years ago I weighed ... a lot less than I do now and it is daunting to think about it because I know how much work it took me to get down to that weight and I wasn't done. I let a lot of "things" unnecessary things get in my way of continuing with my success. I also didn't go about it the right way. I kept detail logs of everything - how much I ate, measuring everything - how much I exercised. It was not sustainable. Plus I find that hard to balance now with my love of cooking all things bad for you. I need to get back to a balance - and I'm getting there the days I have run or walked before work I feel so much better. I just need to remember that feeling.
I'm back though - maybe not as much here and I'll try to be here but balance is hard.
But I something came up on my memories on Facebook and it reminded me just how far I have come.
The picture on the right is from Mother's day 2017. I asked for a day where I could cook with my daughter and the husband would clean.
Everything on the right is home made:
- marinated flank steak
- corn tortilla's
- warm grilled corn with lime dressing
- refried beans
- pickled red onions
the only thing store bought was the sour cream and cheese.
This is a reminder of how far I have come and how far I have yet to go!